These past few months have been a roller coaster of so many things. Sometimes I’ve felt so entirely overwhelmed by everything, and the weight of juggling it on my own, that I just want to curl up and cry.
But … I’ve done my best to stay centered and grounded so that I could birth one very, very important thing.
I haven’t written about it here. Not yet. Only a handful of people were made aware of this particular journey I chose to take. It started about two months ago with my very first appointment at the Fertility Centers of Illinois. Although, I started talking about it in early summer before committing to it shortly after returning from Bali. So it’s perhaps several months in the making, give or take the 37 years that I’ve been alive.
Yesterday, on Thanksgiving, I decided to go public with my story so that it might benefit others. Below is my share.
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On this Thanksgiving day, I give thanks for an intention planted in late summer that manifested this week. I wanted to share, in the event that my story might open some eyes and possibly help other women.
I spent the past few months slowing down and holding space to prep my body with IVF shots, a healthy diet and lots of yoga, meditation and acupuncture … that helped an amazing team of fertility specialists to retrieve a collection of mature eggs for my future family TBD.
It’s extremely empowering, as a single thirty-something with a dream of someday becoming a mother, to take this first step. Technology, combined with shifting norms of what it means to be a female in today’s society, has afforded me this once-unthinkable opportunity.
These precious eggs are now safely stored away, for time TBD. They may never be used by me. Who knows. It’s a gamble, like any investment. BUT, to have this potential waiting for me, when and if the time comes, is a blessing that hushes the ticking of the biological clock. That’s an incredible feeling.
What began as a practical and pragmatic decision also evolved into something much more emotionally-spiritually intense. It was a journey of challenging and positive growth, akin to some of the most powerfully epic adventures that have taken me to far-flung corners of the globe. I wasn’t prepared for that, but I’m grateful for it.
I hope to help other women who are curious about charting this path, so please consider me a resource. I want to demystify this process, this choice, for those who are curious. This needn’t be shrouded in mystery or secrecy. If you have questions, feel comfortable reaching out to me for support.
In the meantime, here is a photo of me giving myself the “trigger shot,” the final shot in series of injections I had to self-administer over 10 days (yes, this adventure was one part chemistry/science experiment). It took place in a private bathroom at 9:20 p.m. during a black-tie gala, with my sister Colleen by my side. It’s definitely the craziest place I had to administer one of these shots.
But we’ll do crazy things to bring dreams to life, right?
:: Happy Thanksgiving ::